Why am I passionate about this?

I am a private practice therapist who has treated adolescents for over 15 years. Since 2016, I’ve helped teens and young adults struggling with gender identity. I discovered, through working with hundreds of families and dozens of adolescents, that many teens develop gender dysphoria only after intellectually questioning their “gender identity.” I found this fascinating and have spent the last 10 years trying to understand this phenomenon. Through my work with parents and adolescents and as a podcast co-host on Gender: A Wider Lens, I’m exploring the following questions: How do individuals make meaning of their distress? What happens when we turn to culturally salient narratives about illness, diagnoses, and treatment pathways? 


I wrote

When Kids Say They're Trans: A Guide for Parents

By Lisa Marchiano, Sasha Ayad, Stella O'Malley

Book cover of When Kids Say They're Trans: A Guide for Parents

What is my book about?

There have been many books written for parents facilitating a child’s gender transition, but few for parents who believe social…

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The books I picked & why

Book cover of The Sleeping Beauties: And Other Stories of Mystery Illness

Sasha Ayad Why did I love this book?

I love this book because the writing gripped me from the first story of girls in Sweden falling into a sleep-like state.

I loved the richness of the case studies and the compassionate humanity with which O’Sullivan recounts mysterious psychogenic illnesses from all around the world. I found myself intrigued by some of the exotic locations and fascinating spiritual beliefs of the people she interviewed while, at the same time, clearly recognizing the way we, too, have our own illness narratives that shape our understanding of distress and suffering here in the West.

I couldn’t put this book down!

By Suzanne O'Sullivan,

Why should I read it?

1 author picked The Sleeping Beauties as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

Shortlisted for the Royal Society Science Book Prize.

A gripping investigation into an extraordinary medical phenomenon, from Wellcome Prize-winning neurologist Suzanne O'Sullivan.

'To compare any book to a Sacks is unfair, but this one lives up to it . . . I finished it feeling thrillingly unsettled, and wishing there was more.' - James McConnachie, Sunday Times

In Sweden, refugee children fall asleep for months and years at a time. In upstate New York, high school students develop contagious seizures. In the US Embassy in Cuba, employees complain of headaches and memory loss after hearing strange noises in the night.…


Book cover of The End of Trauma: How the New Science of Resilience Is Changing How We Think About PTSD

Sasha Ayad Why did I love this book?

My favorite kinds of books are ones that challenge conventional wisdom in a way that feels intuitively familiar and true. This is how I felt while reading this book.

As a therapist, I know how capable and resilient people can be, but I also come into contact with prolonged suffering in my work. I really enjoyed reading about the heroic and remarkable people he profiled, and I loved how Bonanno weaves in science with personal narrative.

I felt like his examples and interviews really brought to life the data on resilience, and I got a ton of practical and useful ideas for how to respond to challenging situations, from big-T trauma to everyday difficulties. 

By George Bonanno,

Why should I read it?

2 authors picked The End of Trauma as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

After 9/11, thousands of mental health professionals from across the country assembled in Manhattan to help handle the almost certain avalanche of traumatized New Yorkers. Curiously, it never came. While plenty of people did seek mental health counseling after 9/11, the numbers were nowhere near expected.

As renowned psychologist George Bonanno argues, psychiatrists failed to predict the response to 9/11 because our model of trauma is wrong. Psychiatrists only study clinically traumatized people, and over time this skewed sample has led us to believe that trauma was the natural response to stress. But what about all the people who never…


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Book cover of Christmas Actually

Christmas Actually By Lisa Darcy,

Every picture tells a story, but it’s not always the one we expect or remember. Christmas Actually is a festive drama about family and forgiveness and a snapshot of modern family life, addressing Instagram to motherhood and everything in between.

Why Christmas? My publisher wanted my new novel to have…

Book cover of Crazy Like Us: The Globalization of the American Psyche

Sasha Ayad Why did I love this book?

I found it fascinating to read Ethan Watters’ analysis of how American concepts of mental illness are exported and globalized, usually with disastrous consequences.

During a cultural moment when social justice, cultural relativism, and imperialism have entered the public consciousness, this book is more relevant than ever. With its focus on mental health labels and diagnoses, specifically, this book helped me understand how our notions of illness, psychological distress, and mental health don’t necessarily translate into other societies.

I loved thinking about familiar diagnoses here in the US, such as anorexia, depression, and PTSD, and reading about well-meaning initiatives that bring these labels into foreign contexts. By attempting to superimpose our conception of mental illness onto people in other countries, we inadvertently diminish the social networks and resilience of the societies we aim to help.

As a therapist who is sometimes weary of our cultural stories about psychological suffering, this book was an illuminating read!

By Ethan Watters,

Why should I read it?

4 authors picked Crazy Like Us as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

“A blistering and truly original work of reporting and analysis, uncovering America’s role in homogenizing how the world defines wellness and healing” (Po Bronson).

In Crazy Like Us, Ethan Watters reveals that the most devastating consequence of the spread of American culture has not been our golden arches or our bomb craters but our bulldozing of the human psyche itself: We are in the process of homogenizing the way the world goes mad.

It is well known that American culture is a dominant force at home and abroad; our exportation of everything from movies to junk food is a well-documented…


Book cover of Bad Therapy: Why the Kids Aren't Growing Up

Sasha Ayad Why did I love this book?

This is the book I’ve been waiting for without realizing it. I found myself nodding, exclaiming out loud, and enthusiastically agreeing with something on almost every single page of this book (which I have annotated heavily!)

I also felt conflicted emotions while reading about some of the detrimental (but well-intentioned) practices of my fellow therapists: inadvertently amplifying trauma, causing children to ruinate on their suffering, and creating greater fragility and anguish in our patients.

Reading this book made me feel like the problems I encounter every day working with adolescents were being recognized on a broad scale, and it also validated a niggling feeling I have about superficial therapy-speak and a culture obsessed with mental health: this is NOT always helpful!

I was also relieved to find practical strategies for developing resilience and confidence in young people in spite of the cultural forces which have undermined these important character traits. 

By Abigail Shrier,

Why should I read it?

3 authors picked Bad Therapy as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER.

From the author of Irreversible Damage, an investigation into a mental health industry that is harming, not healing, American children

In virtually every way that can be measured, Gen Z’s mental health is worse than that of previous generations. Youth suicide rates are climbing, antidepressant prescriptions for children are common, and the proliferation of mental health diagnoses has not helped the staggering number of kids who are lonely, lost, sad and fearful of growing up. What’s gone wrong with America’s youth?

In Bad Therapy, bestselling investigative journalist Abigail Shrier argues that the problem isn’t the kids—it’s…


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Book cover of The Curiosity Cycle: Preparing Your Child for the Ongoing Technological Explosion

The Curiosity Cycle By Jonathan Mugan,

The Curiosity Cycle is a book for parents and educators who want to teach their children to be active explorers of the world. Learning through curiosity leads to adaptive thinking because your child is continually trying to improve his or her understanding of the world, and new facts and ideas…

Book cover of The Coddling of the American Mind: How Good Intentions and Bad Ideas Are Setting Up a Generation for Failure

Sasha Ayad Why did I love this book?

It’s hard for me to overstate the importance this book played in my understanding of college-aged American adolescents. I loved the clarity, organization, and simplicity of the writing here. Bringing in time-tested wisdom from philosophers, ancient faith systems, and cross-cultural perspectives gave me the sense that I was reading about principles and values that will endure far beyond our fleeting cultural moments.

I loved the contrast of wise maxims against trendy and misleading slogans that create a more brittle and distressed generation of young adults. I loved the mix of psychological research, historical anecdotes, and individual college students’ stories, all profiled seamlessly in the book. The sections that look back at historical forces that led to the helicopter and then bulldozer parenting were particularly fascinating.

I love that this book takes a compassionate look at the difficulty of Gen Z without being too harsh or alienating the young adults who may pick it up for a read. It’s challenging to offer both critique and understanding, but I love this book for having mastered this balancing act. 


By Greg Lukianoff, Jonathan Haidt,

Why should I read it?

7 authors picked The Coddling of the American Mind as one of their favorite books, and they share why you should read it.

What is this book about?

New York Times Bestseller * Finalist for the 2018 National Book Critics Circle Award in Nonfiction * A New York Times Notable Book * Bloomberg Best Book of 2018

"Their distinctive contribution to the higher-education debate is to meet safetyism on its own, psychological turf . . . Lukianoff and Haidt tell us that safetyism undermines the freedom of inquiry and speech that are indispensable to universities." -Jonathan Marks, Commentary

"The remedies the book outlines should be considered on college campuses, among parents of current and future students, and by anyone longing for a more sane society." -Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

Something…


Explore my book 😀

When Kids Say They're Trans: A Guide for Parents

By Lisa Marchiano, Sasha Ayad, Stella O'Malley

Book cover of When Kids Say They're Trans: A Guide for Parents

What is my book about?

There have been many books written for parents facilitating a child’s gender transition, but few for parents who believe social or medical transition is not the best option. This book aims to redress this balance. Written by three therapists working in the field, it is a resource for parents who want their children to flourish but do not believe that hasty medicalization is the best way to ensure long-term health and well-being.

Successfully helping a child navigate gender distress without surgery and hormones requires authoritatively taking the reins, not waiting until you’ve found the right therapist or doctor. Our book recognizes that you know your child better than anyone else and will give you the confidence to trust your own instincts.

Book cover of The Sleeping Beauties: And Other Stories of Mystery Illness
Book cover of The End of Trauma: How the New Science of Resilience Is Changing How We Think About PTSD
Book cover of Crazy Like Us: The Globalization of the American Psyche

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